You Asked: How I Get My Kids To Nap At The Same Time

If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you’ve probably noticed I don’t often share a lot about the specific parenting strategies we use. There are a couple reasons for this. First and most importantly, I don’t EVER EVER EVER want to come across like I’m an expert. I assure you I am not! I only know what works for me. And what works for me may or may not work for you.

One of the things that’s so beautiful about motherhood is that we each have different personalities and strengths that are perfectly suited for our kids. We can read as many parenting books as we want, and listen to the opinions of others, but at the end of the day only WE know what they need. And only WE know what makes us the best mom we can be.

The second reason I’m reluctant to share how we do things is that I don’t want this blog to become a place that’s focused on the differences in parenting. Focusing on different approaches can oftentimes cause dissension between moms, and I want this to be a place where everyone feels affirmed in how they choose to parent without being criticized.

BUT, lately I’ve been getting a lot of parenting questions. And while I’m a little nervous to answer them, I also know that when you learn about a strategy that seems to make sense and fits with your parenting style, it can be a game changer. After all, I implemented so much of what I learned from another mom.

So, I decided to start a series called “You Asked.” During this series, I’ll be answering the most frequently asked questions I get from my readers. Again, please hear me when I say I know that how I do things might totally NOT work for you. But in case it makes sense to some of you, I want to put this information out there.

With that said, here’s the first question:

How do you get your kids to nap at the same time every day?

Yes, my kids nap at the same time every day. All four of them. 1:00pm comes, and within 10 minutes they are all fast asleep in their rooms, and I get some mommy time. I suppose that’s one of the huge perks about having so many kids so close together. They ALL still take naps! And I plan on them taking naps for as long as possible. When they don’t need a nap anymore, we’ll be suggesting quiet time in their rooms.

So really I guess napping at the same time really becomes an issue when the second child comes along. With your first, the schedule doesn’t matter as much because it’s just you and the babe. But when you welcome the second baby, in my case my second and third babies at the same time, it can feel a little overwhelming, at least it did to me. I sort of felt lost as to where to start.

I’ll just go ahead and disclose this: I’m a schedule person. I work best when I have a regular routine everyday and I know what to count on. I’m able to set myself up for success, to know when the crazy times are going to come and prepare for them. Schedules are quite literally my sanity. So if you aren’t a schedule person, this post is probably not going to jive with you. And again that is a beautiful thing! We are ALL different and that is absolutely OK!

So when my girls came along, my first thought was, “How am I going to incorporate them into my son’s routine?” At that point, he had just dropped his morning nap but still took his afternoon nap at 1:00pm every day.

For the first month or so when they’re newborns, I feed my babies every three hours. This starts in the hospital. I feed, then keep them awake for a bit, then let them sleep until it’s time to eat again. If they are still sleeping at the three hour mark, I wake them up and feed them, and start the cycle all over again. For example, feed at 7:00am, awake time until sleepy, then sleep until 10:00am when I feed again. Except at night when I let them sleep for as long as they want until they wake up on their own. So the first month, naps aren’t coordinated. If it happens, it’s just a coincidence.

After that first month, I switch up my day schedule, so that I can count on them taking naps at the same time every day. Here’s my schedule.

7:00am: Wake up and first feeding. This is every single day. If they’re sleeping, I’ll wake them up. I find that by starting every day at the same time, it helps to establish a routine quicker. So, at 7:00am I wake baby up and feed. Then I keep baby up for a while, until they get tired, hopefully until around 9:00am. Sometimes when they’re young they don’t quite make it that long.

9:00am: Second feeding while swaddled, then put baby down for a morning nap (always in their crib). My kids usually sleep from 9:00 – 11:00am when they’re really young.

11:00am: Third feeding followed by awake time. From 11:00 – 1:00 we play and have lunch. Sometimes during this stretch the baby needs a little catnap, which I don’t let him sleep for longer than about 10 minutes, and that happens just in my arms. I don’t put my babies down for catnaps in their cribs.

1:00pm: Fourth feeding while swaddled, then put baby down for an afternoon nap. This is when the old kids also go down. When my babies are little they’ll often sleep from 1:00pm – 4:00pm.

4:00pm: Fifth feeding followed by awake time. From 4:00 – 7:00 baby is awake, but usually takes another 10 – 20 minute catnap at some point in my arms or in a vibrating seat.

6:45pm: Bedtime feeding while swaddled, then put baby down for bed (always in their cribs). By 5 weeks my twins and baby 4 were sleeping 8 – 9 hour stretches. By 8 weeks they were sleeping 9 – 10 hour stretches. By about 4 months, my twins were sleeping the whole 12 hours. We’ll have to wait to see if Case follows suit!

10:00pm: As soon as baby starts skipping this feeding, I pump before I go to bed and store the extra. And that way when the baby wakes up to feed I’m not too uncomfortable and don’t have to pump during the night.

Obviously then I just wake up whenever the baby wakes me up in the night to feed.

7:00am: Wake up and feed (even if we just fed at 5:00 or sometime around then) so that we stay on the same schedule the following day.

SO, that’s what works for us! Case is now 8 weeks old and I’m only waking up once, around 4am or 5am to feed him! I’ve found that by feeding by babies enough during the day, they don’t need to eat as much during the night. And I also never let them sleep for longer than three hours during the day, or otherwise that seems to mess them up at night.

As for how I put them in their cribs, I feed them to a point when they’re drowsy, then put them down with a pacifier. If they don’t go to bed right away, I’ll keep going in and giving them a pacifier until they’re settled. When they’re little, I don’t let them cry it out. When they reach about 4 months and develop the ability to self soothe, then we’ll sleep train them if needed, but by that point they’re really pretty used to the routine and go to bed without a fight.

Now obviously there are always X factors and days when our schedule gets thrown off for a variety of reasons, and kids are still totally unpredictable at times, but this is a good starting point for us. And also every kid is so different. Some kids sleep through the night super young and others take more time. So much of that is out of our control! So if your baby doesn’t sleep through the night, DO NOT be hard on yourself! You are doing a great job!

If you have questions about this or I missed anything that you were wondering about, feel free to leave a comment and I’ll do my best to answer them.

XOXO,

Amber

P.S. If you have parenting questions you’d like to ask, please email them to amber@mommysmetime.com.

P.S. For more reflections on parenthood and life, follow us on Facebook (Hun Let’s Run) and on Instagram: @ambermariekuiper and @jakekuiper! We’d also love for you to subscribe to our Hun, Let’s Run Podcast! For more info about joining our fitness community as a customer or coach, please email us at amber@mommysmetime.com!