Having Kids Close In Age: You Won’t Regret It

We went out to dinner with some friends a while back and one of the first things they asked us was, “So, do you get stared at ALL the time when you’re out with your kids?”

My first thought was, “Why?” Then I remembered that we aren’t normal. I gave birth to four kids within three years. FOUR. These days, four kids is a lot, regardless of how far apart they are. The fact that ours are so close together is grounds enough for most people to seriously question our sanity. But life with so many kids has become so normal to me that I don’t really think about it as odd anymore.

I guess we do get a lot of attention when we’re out in public. “Are they ALL yours?” “Twins?” “How far apart are they?” “You’ve got your hands full!”

I suppose at first I got a little annoyed by these comments. They made me feel even more alone than I already felt. It seemed like for the most part, when people would open their mouths, they felt sorry for us. They couldn’t imagine how our life could be enjoyable.

But then there were also those dear people who would see us while our kids were throwing tantrums and would say, “You are blessed.” And they really meant it. The first time I met one of these sweet-hearted saints, I teared up. She got it! She understood that despite the chaos, we were some of the luckiest people on earth.

I’m sharing this today because I know some of you are about to welcome a second, third, or fourth child. They’re gonna be pretty close in age, and quite frankly you’re a little terrified of the unknowns. How will you be able to give enough attention to each of them? How will the older ones adapt to a new addition? How will you find time for your marriage? What if money gets too tight? Can you really start all over again with an infant?

All these things are completely natural things to think about. In fact, in our society, I think they’re the things our minds default to because it isn’t normal to have lots of kids or to have them close together. It isn’t convenient. It isn’t comfortable. There isn’t instant gratification.

The truth is, the next few years will be demanding. You will be required to give of yourself in ways you never wanted to. Your life will be totally and completely about your kids, and there will be little room for anything else, including you. But through it, you’ll experience crazy amounts of personal growth and indescribable joy. Because when life gets real, when push comes to shove, when we don’t know HOW we’re going to make it through another hour, it’s then that we realize we’re stronger than we think. We realize that maybe we weren’t created to be served, but to serve.

And so, on the hard days, when I get extra attention from strangers and wonder if I truly have gone crazy, my heart tells me I haven’t. It tells me that this life isn’t about me being comfortable. It’s about thanking God for the way he chose to grow my family. It’s about asking Him to use us as He desires. It’s about being happy about the fact that I GET to be a mom to four little ones. I get to teach them that life is not about them, but about something so much greater. I get to help them understand that we’re all on this planet together, at this time, for a special reason. And that the secret to their contentment will come when they discover what their true mission is.

{Photo credit: Poppy Designs }

P.S. For more reflections on parenthood and life, follow us on Facebook (Hun Let’s Run) and on Instagram: @ambermariekuiper and @jakekuiper! We’d also love for you to subscribe to our Hun, Let’s Run Podcast! For more info about joining our fitness community as a customer or coach, please email us at amber@mommysmetime.com!