Why I Don’t Pretend To Be A Perfect Parent

I’m going to be completely transparent with you. The past couple weeks have been rough. And you know what? I can’t even pinpoint exactly why. It just seems like life is taking TONS of extra effort lately.

Sure, there are a few obvious things that have contributed.

1. The kids have been sick. First it was colds. Then ear infections. And most recently? Explosive diarrhea. Which means I’ve turned into a poop examiner. Which means instead of taking adorable pictures of my kids, I’m taking pictures of their feces and texting them to my mom, who’s a nurse, and knows exactly what the different colors mean.

2. We’ve been stuck inside. Sick kids leads to clingy kids who aren’t jazzed about doing much of anything except being held. And watching Disney Junior.

3. I’ve been working as a short order cook. The only thing my kids want to eat when they’re sick are crackers, oatmeal, mac ‘n cheese, and ice cream. But never at the same time. And because I’m desperate for them to eat anything I find myself taking them to the pantry one by one and letting them place their order.

4. I haven’t had time to myself. I love my kids dearly, but I’m not someone who can be with my them 24/7. I need a little time apart from them to recharge. To do what I want to do without interruption. But when kids are sick, all hands are on deck. I mean, lately I’ve been in such demand that I’ve even been sitting on the toilet with one of them piled on my lap.

5. I’ve spent little time with my husband. With kids up at all hours and one particular little boy crawling into our bed halfway through the night, alone time with my hubby has been limited. And instead of being sweet to him when we finally do have time together, my stressed out, sleep deprived self kind of turns into a brat.

If you were a little bird looking in at my life, those five things are probably what you’d see. Yet we’ve only scratched the surface as to why I’ve been struggling.

Here’s the thing. As parents, we feel a LOT of pressure to do it right. To protect our kids from sickness. To show them how to act politely. To teach them their A B C’s, and their colors, and how to count. To fill their bodies with healthy food. To foster good sleep habits. To model a healthy marriage. And of course, to do it all with a smile on our face.

Then weeks like this come when all hell breaks out. And NOTHING goes as I’d like it to. I wasn’t able to keep the sickness away. They had way too much screen time. We didn’t spend much time working on our A B C’s. The only thing they ate were carbs, carbs, and more carbs. They weren’t sleeping well. They heard mommy and daddy bicker. And they experienced a stressed out version of me instead of their happy momma.

And I felt defeated. I felt like I was surely messing them up for life. That the only thing they would know going into preschool was the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse song. And how to pitch a fit.

But then I remembered something. LIFE happens. Kids get sick. Moms and Dads get stressed. Parents fight. I’m not perfect, and it’s okay to admit that. It’s okay to admit that I have struggles, and that I need encouragement to keep going. It’s okay to admit that I’m a work in progress.

There’s FREEDOM in admitting that I’m not a perfect mom. I have nothing to hide. I have nothing to show off. I don’t need to be a slave to the pressure of perfection, or care about what other people think, or carry mom guilt. I can simply be me, a mom who will keep trying my best, because of my deep love for my family. And my best will always be enough.

Friend, your best is enough too. You don’t need to be perfect, you just need to love your kids like only you can.

XOXO,

Amber

P.S. For more reflections on parenthood and life, follow us on Facebook (Hun Let’s Run) and on Instagram: @ambermariekuiper and @jakekuiper! We’d also love for you to subscribe to our Hun, Let’s Run Podcast! For more info about joining our fitness community as a customer or coach, please email us at amber@mommysmetime.com!

(photo credit: Poppy Designs)